CONTROL : PATIENCE
A Pentax 645 was my impulse buy of the month. I needed some sort of control of how I spend my money due to the large, seventeen thousand dollar bill I received from my climbing fall at the end of June. I figured the $150 splurge for this camera was a good thing for me to do. I deserve it! Renée Jacobs (http://www.reneejacobs.com) an art nude/ erotica photographer and mentor of mine was selling it via FB. It was probably her quickest sale of the morning: a quick payment via PayPal, a promise to work with her as a model next time I'm in LA or France, it was packed up and sent it priority mail, and BAM! A package arrives on my doorstep from LA in time for the weekend's adventures, some of it documented in medium format.
As I shuffle piles around my loft, preparing to move, again, albeit very slowly and cautiously (still hurt from my fall, clocking in now at an 80%), I realized that I have well over a hundred rolls of 120 film, most expired, but that's the way I like it. Light leaks and accidental surprises are what most analog camera users are looking for, so I stuffed a ridiculous amount of gold and silver film rolls into my LoweAlpine bag and headed north to Lee's Ferry, straight to the Colorado River.
I was walking, I mean cane hobbling across Heritage Square early one morning about a month ago. A Native came up to me in a drunken stooper asking for change. I said no. He started to walk away, but turned to me and said "well I have something for you." I was concerned, but not too concerned. It didn't feel alarming, most of the natives are kind especially that early in the morning. He handed me a small crumpled slip of paper, one that would be found inside a fortune cookie. I opened it- and it had only one word written: PATIENCE.
These images are were taken with the NikonD600.
The process of shooting film requires patience. My four rolls of film (12x4=48 +/- photos) are currently at Color Services in Santa Barbara. They are the few photo labs that process medium format color film in perfection, and they are a quick drive from my home in Ojai. Since there are no film developers here in Flagstaff or Northern Arizona, I ship all my film there, they do it all. All my darkroom equipment is living in plastic bins in the dark depths of my U-Haul storage unit #1060. So sad. Soon, I tell myself. Soon. Patience. You will develop and print once again. Patience in waiting for my film to return from SB, and patience in the fact that my darkroom will be set-up again in an amazing space. PATIENCE.
A printed invoice sent away with my credit card number hoping that at least one frame in those rolls was worth the cost of developing, time and effort. Owning a new camera, learning the lens, making it an extension of yourself, and believing in your skills, takes patience. Lots of trials and errors. I have to commit to a result, whether good, bad or ugly, and move forward, improving.